3 Reasons Why You SHOULD NOT Share Your Goals

By Nicole Tinkham

It’s totally normal wanting to keep your big, hairy, crazy goals to yourself. Sometimes those goals are just too huge to share with others because what if you fail? You’ll feel like a complete idiot to the rest of the world. It’s just so much safer to keep them to yourself to avoid that humiliation. You’ll also hear people recommend doing the exact opposite by sharing your goals with the world. Many people say that doing this will hold you accountable to those goals. Not wanting to let those people down actually pushes you to achieve your big goal. So what are you supposed to do? Tell people your goals or keep them to yourself? We’ll dive into this a little bit deeper in this blog as we discuss the top 3 reasons why you SHOULD NOT share your goals.

1.    Don’t share your goals with the wrong people. You may not think twice about this when a certain goal pops into your head. You’re so excited about it and you just want to tell everyone what your big plans are. But beware; it’s important that you tell the right people. Go ahead and tell the people who will support you. They are the people who even if they don’t think the things you’re doing are the right choice, have your back anyway. They love you and will be a positive influence on all that you do no matter what. If you have people like that in your life you should, by all means, tell them.

The issue comes in when you tell someone who doesn’t want to see you succeed at your goals. Do not share your goals with someone who continuously puts you down or breaks your spirit. Why would you be friends with someone like that anyway? Also, don’t share your goals with those who you know will try to get you to back down from doing them. Your mother (or anyone you’re close with) for example, may not agree with what you’re doing. She loves you and supports you but maybe she also nags you and tries to steer you in a different direction every chance she gets. If this happens, be polite and continue on with your plans anyway. When you share your goals with the wrong people, you may be holding yourself back from your full potential. You may not even get started at all which is even scarier.

2.    Don’t celebrate too much before you even do anything. When you announce that you’re about to do something big, like quit smoking, for example, people will be excited for you. That’s an incredible goal to improve your life. While it may feel awesome to get congratulated before you even get started, it can take away the excitement of the actual achievement. It’s all fun and games until you have to put in the work, right? Plus, how many of these people will still be there throughout your journey cheering you on? Hopefully a lot of them but you just never know. They could fall off as soon as things start to get difficult, right when you need them most.

Remember that this is your journey. The important thing is that you get started. Worry about that and that alone for now. You can celebrate along the way with every victory but don’t exhaust yourself before you start. Be clear to others that this is only the beginning.

3.    Don’t pretend you’ve already achieved your goals (too much). Talking about where you see yourself in the future satisfies the need to achieve that goal in which case you may never follow through with actually achieving it. The more you talk about it, the more comfortable your mind feels with staying where you’re at and not putting in the extra work. Now I don’t 100% fully believe in this but one thing I do know for sure is that it is incredibly satisfying picturing, dreaming and talking about the life you want to live and the goals you want to achieve. It really is heavenly. The trick is not getting too comfortable and finding it in you to get to work and make it happen.

We’ve talked about why you shouldn’t tell someone else your goals and they all make sense for the most part, right? If you tell the wrong people, they could bring you down and demotivate you. If others celebrate before you even start, it takes away the excitement of achievement. And if you talk about your goals enough as if you’ve already accomplished them, you’re satisfying the mind and feel at peace with where you’re at even if it’s not your reality. But all of these things can be flipped, making telling others your goals a huge benefit for you.

Telling the right people about your goals can lift you up and take you further than ever imagined.

Having others root you on before getting started and throughout the journey can motivate you to keep pushing forward even when things get difficult.

Thinking and talking about your goals often gets you in the right mindset with a clear vision of what you want. As long as you follow through, it can help you make your dreams come to life.

As long as you do it right, telling others about your goals can actually benefit you. Just be smart about it. Tell the right people, know that starting is just the beginning, and take action on those big goals to make them happen. In the end, it’s up to you on how you handle your goals and who you tell about them. Find what works best for you. If that means keeping it to yourself, that’s totally fine. Just continuously look at and work toward those goals. You can do this. Get focused on what you want and get to work!

4 Common Determination Killers And How To Prevent Them

By Nicole Tinkham

Have you ever started your day with a burst of positive energy, ready to get amazing things done only to find yourself drained and unmotivated by 10AM? You then tell yourself that tomorrow will be different and the same exact thing happens and you find yourself in a vicious cycle of never really accomplishing anything at all. On a larger scale, this also tends to happen in the beginning of the year. We plan for a big, successful year and a few months in we find ourselves going right back to old habits. So the big question is, WHAT is causing our determination to accomplish these things to vanish and how do we stop it from happening? Read on for the answers.

1.    We focus on what isn’t working

In all honesty, it is extremely difficult to focus on the things going well or the things you want to see happen when everything is crashing down around you. And this will happen to you, we all experience moments of disaster. We like to think of it as a test to see if you really do care about your goals as much as you say you do. The tricky thing is, when we focus our energy on the negative things going on, we receive more negative things in every area of life.

The solution: Daily gratitude

Every single day write down or think about the good things you do have in your life and remind yourself of how lucky you are despite what may be going on. This forces you to look on the bright side and bring more positive things to you.

2.    We get stuck on the past

Why is it that we typically remember how badly others have made us feel versus the compliments we receive? Maybe it’s because the negative hits harder and it may cause you to start second guessing yourself. Even if you think you are over something that was said to you in the past, we bet you really aren’t. The next time you try to take on a big project you may begin to think “I’m not good enough for this”. This thought it coming to mind for a reason, because you’ve heard it in the past.

The Solution: Create new agreements

Flip that negative thought into a positive one and start telling yourself “I am skilled enough to take this on and so much more” even if you don’t believe in it just yet. The more you say this new phrase to yourself, the more you will believe it and the more you can achieve.

3.    We let everyday stresses get to us

It’s not just the big problems but the little things that wear us down every single day as well. It’s being stuck in traffic, oversleeping or getting into an argument with a co-worker. These things are draining and they also have the power to cause the rest of our experiences that day to be just as miserable.

The Solution: Take a break

Get yourself back in the right mindset by going somewhere quiet, closing your eyes and focus on your vision or goals. Remember why you are doing this. Sure it may be difficult now but picture yourself reaching your goals and how incredible that will feel. What you’re going through now will be worth it if you get your head back in the game and give it your all!

4.    We fear change

It is definitely not easy making a huge life change or even small changes, for that matter. The idea of change sounds incredible (finally getting that dream job or making a major move to your favorite city) but when it comes down to actually doing it, fear can stop us in our tracks. All of a sudden that amazing idea sounds like a bad idea all because we put too much thought into the bad things that could possibly happen.

The Solution: Embrace change

Instead of thinking what could go wrong, consider all the things that could go right. If you don’t go after it now, you never know what could have been. Sure, there will be some bumps along the way. There usually is when starting something brand new. But enjoy the new journey and keep looking ahead to future possibilities.

Isn’t it such a shame that we let these little things (like one thing someone said to us years ago) keep us from reaching our goals? It’s true though, isn’t it? We can easily feel so defeated by the end of the day. Preventing these determination killers really comes down to one thing, changing your way of thinking. You have to start seeing things in a different light and focus on the positive things in life. It’s the only way you’ll be able to move forward with your goals.

Tell us, what’s one thing you find that’s holding you back? Let us know in the comments!

You Can Be A World Famous Artist (or whatever else you want to be)

By Nicole Tinkham

I don’t think I’m alone when I confess that it took me a really long time to figure out what it was I wanted to do with my life. In fact, I’m still trying to figure it out. When we’re young, we’re always asked “What do you want to be when you grow up?” and any answer you give is perfectly acceptable. You’re encouraged to dream big. But when reality sets in and you actually have to make this decision for real, you don’t get the same reaction when you respond with “To be a world famous artist traveling the world”. It’s not the norm and something that’s different scares most people. Maybe it’s the people around you trying to talk you out of doing something huge like that or maybe it’s you, not even allowing yourself to dream big simply because it sounds too crazy.

It’s simple to have the mindset of just surviving day by day, looking forward to the weekends when you get a short break and then getting right back into this routine of yours. By doing this you aren’t seeing the big picture though. You’re not really thinking about what this life has to offer or how you could make a huge difference in the world. You’re just putting your head down and trying to get by. Is that any way to live though? If you think about all the things you could possibly be doing right now, is doing this what you would choose if you didn’t have to worry about anything else? Listen, we all know life is way too short to not enjoy what we do but why aren’t most of us making any changes?

The big thing that comes into play here is fear. It’s the fear of failure, the fear of what others might say, the fear that you might actually succeed, and many more. But what if when you were born you were meant to do something very specific? Something that no one else could do quite like you. Something that you were destined to do and succeed in? It’s something you feel deep down in your gut but never considered (or are too afraid to) act on. You are robbing the world of your special skills by not stepping out to do it! You have the power to help so many people and actually enjoy and be happy in your life and you’re most likely doing nothing about it. You’re choosing to do things you don’t fully enjoy. Doesn’t that sound kind of silly?

If you never make the leap, you will never know what could have been in store for you. Even when all odds are against you, if you were meant to do a particular thing in your life it will somehow work out. You must have faith and believe in yourself. Think about it this way; if you were to wrap up life right now, would you be happy with what you left the world with? Would you be happy with your accomplishments? If not, you need to make a change. You need to feel proud of the life you have lived. And if you want people to remember you when you’re gone, you must make an impact in some way on someone. The best way to do that is to follow that gut feeling and just go after what feels right in your heart.

If you do one thing today, make this be it. This one way of thinking will open your eyes to the possibilities. It will have you believing in yourself like you never have before. Whatever it is you want to do in your life whether it be to become a famous artist, an actress, a business owner, a singer, or whatever is in your heart, ask yourself if anyone else is or has already done this thing. Doesn’t have to be someone you know personally. Just think about whether it has been done before. Chances are it has and you know what that means? It means that you can do it too. It is not impossible. If someone else can do it, then why not you? Those people out there doing the things you want to do are no different than you. They don’t have anything special that you don’t have. They just went after what they wanted and they got there. Just like you can and will do.

You are never too old, the timing is never too late, and you are never too inexperienced to make things happen in your life.  What you need to do is consider the possibilities, set a goal for yourself, take action, become focused, and never give up. If it’s in your heart, keep going even through the difficult times. You will get there regardless of age or where you’re at in life right now. You CAN be that world famous artist or whatever else it is you want to be.

Why Dreaming Big Is Getting You Nowhere And What You Need To Start Doing For Success

By Nicole Tinkham

You’ll hear us say it all the time and it’s definitely something we believe in and stick by. It’s important to love this life of yours, to do the things that make you happy, and to dream big. You may have already started dreaming big by writing some goals down, creating a vision board, and visualizing your future. That’s great if you have and something we still encourage you to do. But what happens when you’re doing all this dreaming and nothing ever happens? If you’re feeling a little defeated and frustrated, this blog is for you. We’ll explain why dreaming big is getting you nowhere and what you need to start doing for success.

Dreaming big is the first piece of the puzzle. It’s figuring out what you really want in life and it’s certainly a crucial step. But if you stop at your dreams without taking action, you will never move forward. How do you expect these dreams to actually happen? Think they’re just going to fall into your lap? We can tell you from experience that’s not how this works. What you can start doing though is thinking big.

For example, it’s so easy to get lost in the excitement of a new career opportunity. You’re creating this new life for yourself and you have a list of things you’re dreaming of accomplishing. But the question is, are you taking those dreams and strategically planning what exactly will happen in your future? When you don’t have a plan one of two things typically happens. Either you get burnt out on this big dream or you fall behind trying to adapt to these new changes in your life.

What you need to do is get out of your head and get “all in” on the things you want to accomplish. You must give it your all. You must have a plan and take action. You must get focused. You may even have to make sacrifices like TV time, sleep, and extra vacations at least until you get things rolling. If you’re not 100% in it, it’s still all just a dream. You need to switch from dreaming big to thinking (and doing) big!

There’s no way of predicting the future but it doesn’t hurt to have a game plan either way. Know exactly what your next step is if you succeed and what your next step is if you fail. Sure, there will always be little surprises that come up along the way but you can handle them confidently when you have a strong plan. Don’t just wait around to see what happens. Be prepared.

So while dreaming big paints the picture of how your life could look, it’s also important to think big. Take action on those dreams, follow through with them, and plan for anything the future may bring (good or bad). It may be impossible to predict exactly what could happen in the future but think through every possible situation you can imagine and plan for it. If you’re a dreamer but feel stuck, start doing these things to finally see success in your life.

How to Follow Your Passion in a Job you Hate

By Nicole Tinkham

If you’ve held multiple job positions in your life, you probably know that you’re not always going to strike gold with every new career choice. In fact, sometimes that ‘dream job’ you took turns out to be a complete nightmare. So, what do you do when you feel like you’re in over your head with no way out? Finding a new job is a daunting task, but staying in a place where you’re miserable will negatively impact both you and the people around you. When you’re unhappy, it spreads negative vibes throughout the office and ultimately affects the entire company. If you dread going into the office every morning, you might be lacking passion. We’d love to help you bring your unique passion into the workplace so you can begin loving the work you do. We’ll start by defining your passion so you can move forward with pursuing your dreams.

Figure out what your passion is

Do you even know what your real passion is? Many people don’t. You’ve got your hobbies, the things you like to do here and there on the weekends. However, just because you’re fond of doing these things doesn’t qualify them as your true passion. To figure out what yours is, ask yourself the following questions.

1.    What are you constantly thinking about?
2.    What are you bringing up in conversation over and over again?
3.    What do people come to you for advice on?
4.    What do you get compliments on the most?
5.    Get some great ideas at night? What’s keeping you up?
6.    Do you ever get caught working on something you’re not supposed to at work? What is it?
7.    What do you feel your purpose is? What can you bring to the world that others can’t?

It’s ok if you don’t have it all figured out yet. You can always focus on your hobbies until your passion comes to you. One of your hobbies may even become that passion.

How can you bring value to the company?

Once you’ve determined your passion, it’s time to figure out how to integrate it into the job you already have. Maybe you can incorporate certain skills or tasks into your current position. If not, there could be a position at your current company that’s more aligned with your passion. Look into transferring into that position being sure to highlight specific skills that you have to offer.

Don’t be discouraged if there’s not a position you’d be interested in. You’ll just have to get a little more creative. How could your skills benefit the company? Maybe a new position within the company could be made just for you. If it’s something you really want, it’s worth pitching your idea.

Follow your passion on the side

So maybe you can’t work your passion into your full time job. Don’t become frustrated, we have a solution! You can always work towards it on your own time. Since you’ll be keeping your 9 to 5 job (for the time being), we recommend finding at least one thing you do love about it. If this is impossible for you to do, it may be time to find a new one.

Starting your own business while working full-time can get hectic. Be sure to plan your time wisely. Make a schedule and keep an effective to-do list with you at all times. You can even find clever ways to squeeze in a few tasks throughout the day on your lunch break. Do whatever you can get done in a day, have fun, and remember to give yourself a break! Doing something that you love even if it’s only in the evening should improve your attitude in the workplace.

Find a new job

If you’ve tried all of the above and it’s just not working out, it’s probably time to find a new job. This can be scary but once you go through with your decision it’ll feel like a weight has been lifted. When choosing a new job, don’t just jump at the first thing you find. Make sure that what you’ll be doing aligns with your passion so you don’t get stuck in another job you hate.

Often times these big decisions are easier said than done. Many people will tell you to just find a new job if you’re unhappy. Simple as that! But it’s not that simple. You can’t always leave a job without a plan plus it takes time to find a new one that you’ll actually enjoy. Just remember to keep your eye on your goals and passions. Continue to make steps forward no matter how small and you’ll eventually get there.